Growing Beyond

Thursday, November 17, 2011

I have been feeling a little lost lately! Not sure if it's in anticipation of the holidays or rush to prepare for them? Either way, I know myself well enough to recognize the need for some evaluation and re-prioritizing. The whole self-help thing may not work for everyone, but it helps me tremendously..........and so I wanted to share what comforts me today:


  • The more your life expresses your own passions, the more at home you will feel in your life.
  • The paradox is that you must learn to get out of your own way in order for that expression to take place.
  • As I have intimidated, the obstacles we encounter are always walls created by our small self, our personality, which is constantly on guard & trying to protect itself.
  • The small self isn't real.
  • It's through your being here now, being fully engaged in every moment, that those walls of isolation will come down.
  • The more you are able to let go of the preconceptions about who you think you are & how you think things are supposed to be, the more you experience what's really here & the more possible it is for the vitality you've longed for to fill your world.
  • The fuller your life becomes, the less you even remember how constricted & frustrating it once was.
  • We believe that we're inadequate, that we can't do what we want to do because we're not good enough, not talented enough, not strong enough.
  • The problem is that the self who is waiting for the goal to be accomplished, for the thing it prefers to show up, or for the inadequacy to go away is your personality, your small self.
  • It will never, ever be satisfied because it's very existence depends on your not being present & your not simply doing what's there to be done.
  • It's one of life's great paradoxes that what is universal can only be accessed by becoming completely who are as an individual.
  • Once you see that you are most present when you are engaged in things that allow you to transcend your small self's boundaries, you begin to understand the ingredients necessary for a life that's fully charged & fully vital.
  • If you never investigate the small self, the greater self-the universal you- remains firmly beyond reach.
  • Life is about playing our part in the concert of manifestation.
  • It is in the this never-ending unfolding that fulfillment lies- not in the accomplishment of some goal but in the journeying itself.
  • If you pay attention to what is entering your world, the teachers & teachings you need at that moments will be there, each of them manifestations of the one true teacher, life itself.
Years ago I read a book called the The Not So Big Life, by Sarah Susanka. (Inner Peace, earlier post here.) Every once in a while you find a book, or an author that really speaks to you. For me, this book was fitting because it addressed a lot of the things that I personally struggle with.

Depression and anxiety crippled me at times throughout my late teens and early twenties. It is something that I have always been open about because, I know what it is like to struggle alone and feel like others don't understand.

My long-term treatment plan has been education and a constant focus on honest self examination and awareness. My journaling has been incredibly helpful in this process (and now the blog too). I saw the above quote on Tumblr yesterday and it got me thinking.

I went back to my notes on this book and wanted to share.

Personally, I struggle with my small self. I think that a lot of my insecurities come from this place, and my expectations feed these insecurities. I know in my heart and my mind that in order to set myself up for success, I need to ignore my small self and let go of all the angst and worry about what is to come. Just be present in this moment and not worry about the next! Sometimes it is just easier said then done!

This holiday season I am going to work hard to not get caught up in my expectations, or other's. I just want to enjoy my family and friends and celebrate all that I have to be thankful for!

Have a great weekend and thanks for listening! Part of my growth is posting things I like, even if I fear you might not, because you never know who might relate..........right?


jora said...

Thank you so much for this, Stephanie. I love to read blogs by people who fully reveal themselves. I struggled with depression pretty intensively during my third pregnancy. I didn't write about it on my blog at first and just went MIA for awhile. I decided to write about it later and I was beyond overwhelmed with support by people I knew but mostly people I didn't (and who just read my blog). I think sharing this here is part of that exploration of the smaller self you wrote about. I hope you are feeling strong and happy very soon! xo

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